wow. its august already

Its already august

I have decided to put the kids IN school.

vanessa will start kindergarten, and alejandro will be entering 5th grade!!!

wow.

i'm getting old

as my girls nap

I remembered about this blog I started! Not like I have many followers (2!!!)
Anyhow...I am busy busy.....Alejandro is coming to an end to 4th grade...growing up so fast.
Vanessa is gearing up for kindergarten
Esmeralda is still a baby!!!

My life is good, can't complain, take the good with the bad.
I am happy, kids are happy, guess thats what really matters.
this fall, I am contemplating homeschooling my kids.

I stay home, so why not? What will i do with my day when they are all in school?
At least their only influences will be what I allow in their lives!!!

I am super duper excited , but WAY WAY nervous!!!!---did I mention---SCARED?

end of a semester

the semester is coming to an end. talk about a rough one. i guess its cuz i'm in class sooooo freakin late at night. its wearing me down but hey two more weeks. i can handle it...but i will be back in class in june after a 3 week vacay or break...then my schedule will be crazier than ever...mon and wed 9-1230 (not too bad) tues and thurs 2-745 (eck) and saturday 8-2 (double eck)...but I will then be done with all the pre requisites by the end of the fall, which will put me one semester ahead to focus on acing the TEAS!!!!!
it is a long journey for me, and without the help of my mother, and sister in law i would not be where i am. they help me sooooo much with my kids. i am just so blessed to have them nearby to help me.

I have been real busy lately. With school winding down to an end, I am preparing for my summer courses. I don't want to take them, but its the only way I will get back on track... I have fallen so behind already with having to drop out or put it on hold for so long. We are also house shopping, which is waaaaaaaaaay stressful, and waaaaaaaaaaaaay exciting!
Easter came and went, passed us by quick. was nice. just us family. next upcoming event is alejandro receiving the sacrament of holy eucharist. He is so excited, and happy that he passed his final interview.

vacation from a vacation

we went on our trip to san antonio texas. it was good, but rough on me. i need a vacation to recover from my vacation! i traveled there by air with three children, no other adults! it was overall good. i am thankful that i have well mannered children. they did complain only when tired, but otherwise were so happy to be there. i enjoyed my time with them, they were all mine and only mine for 5 days, i didn't have to share them with anyone. i am very tired though and trying to catch up with school is tough i feel like i fell so behind! i also have not been feeling so great and was kind of sick over there! my vanessa fell off the bed in the hotel and she had a seizure, now that was scary! i thought i was gonna lose her, it was one of the most terrifying moments in my life! thankfully all is ok with her now...no more episodes, she is at my moms tonight. i miss her, she is so much fun. she went to spend the night with her grampo and nana. she does rule that house, well all three of them do, but i think its something about her looking so much like me at that age that ultimately melts my daddies heart

not much

So mister groundhog saw his shadow yesterday, which means 6 more weeks of winter...and I started the day with the question "where is the snow", and guess what!?!!? its here! yay!

I have been going non-stop for quite some time now, and I have a test tonight in Chemistry, but am hoping in my secret heart of hearts, that class will be canceled. I kind of just want to hang out at home with my kids and hubby on this snowy evening...Eddie's class got canceled already, but mine, however, is still on, as far as I know!!!

There is not much else going on....I mean, do I have more room in my life for anything else?

Esmeralda has a little cold, Vanessa is just about over it, and Alex still has a cough, but that boy is stubborn as ever! Everyday when I pick him up from school, his jacket is in his backpack, and he is jumping around in the snow or rain, or cold!!!! Can I really be upset with him, since I remember doing that, it was not cool to wear a jacket, lol!


Esmeralda is also very stubborn now, and I am wondering if she is hitting the terrible 2's early! I don't remember Vanessa, or Alejandro being this naughty. But I must say, she is very funny to watch.......

I made it through my first two weeks of classes. Passed my first test in medical terminology with 100%. Honestly , I didn't think I had it in me anymore...I also attended my first Life Night. It was fun, and even my kids enjoyed it!

well its almost the end of January... wow time flies!

Eddie is also taking his course to get his pipe fitters license! I am excited for him.

My son got straight A's again...that little boy is so smart!
Esmeralda's labs were all okay except one but she will have to be re-tested in six months. she saw her nutritionist yesterday and I have to make a few changes in her overall diet...but I think I am on the right track since she gained 5 more ounces since her last doctors appointment, one week ago~

I am sitting here, thinking......does anybody even read this stuff??? Not sure, but I feel that I need to sit here and use this blog as my tool...to vent...I guess. I am not feeling too great emotionally. I am now going to school full time and am very happy with this opportunity in my life. I have always loved school, just ask anyone who knew me as a kid! I am always eager to learn, but can you teach an old dog new tricks? I am very nervous to fail, because the courses that I am in now will determine my admission into the nursing program. I am a full time momma, and I don't take this duty lightly at all! Everything I do is for those three precious gifts. Even my education, is to better their life. Sometimes though, I do not feel the support I so desperately need here at home. It can be discouraging, but I am not easily knocked down either.
I pray that I keep the courage and drive needed to not allow anyone's negative comments to block my path~

a sunday...

today is sunday. my son and i went to mass. it was a very interesting homily that father brennan gave. my son was very attentive today. after mass, my friend andrea who is the new youth pastor at our church got up to let everyone know she is looking for new core members. i signed up! yay, i am excited but nervous. life teen is a great program that helps teens, therefore, i will have my very own "teen" to mentor! agh...can i handle it? next sunday will be my first teen night. the great thing about our church is that we are so family/community oriented, that i get to bring my kiddos with me! what better place for them to be than at church, learning about our heavenly father?!?!?!?

a new year....

well its 2010!!! wow, time flies. this year my son will be 9 years old agh! I am going back to school this month, on the 19th. Eddie got released back to work, starting on the 20th, which couldn't be soon enough, because although he was still getting a paycheck, it was a teeny tiny one!
esmeralda is now sick with the stomach flu i believe. but after speaking to a woman at the bank, i am wondering if maybe she is sick with a cold instead, because the vomiting only happens at night, probably because of the phlegm.
any whoo... our new years eve was quite nice. although i was,a nd still am sick with a cold, my mom and i prepared dinner for everyone, menudo, beans, green chile enchilada's, tamales, pumpkin roll, cheese cake...and after dinner, we baked cookies, and miss vanessa had a blast frosting them. then we came home, and waited for midnight, because it sounds like WW II relived in these parts. everybody goes nuts shooting (killing) the old year...superstitious old fools! i used to enjoy this, but dont anymore, because, now as a momma i worry, what if one of those bullets falls outta the sky and hits one of my babies?

blog sweet blog

well i have not blogged in quite some time. i have been super busy. this month is nuts! i have something planned for everyday, practically. and to top off all these activities, my son has now joined basket ball! where will i squeeze the extra hours?
things that have gone on lately:
not in any particular order, lol
*esmeralda moved into her room
*spent time with family that i rarely see, which is good because, i am glad to get to know my family on my fathers side
*vanessa and esmeralda had their first school dance
*alejandro passed his first interview with fr. brennan

I am sure there are more things that have gone on, but i am so preoccupied with getting my kiddo ready for his presentation tomorrow in church.
he will be posing as st. joseph, and has to do a presentation on him, fun stuff, this mommy business

Changing lifestyles

I have been wanting to change my lifestyle for quite some time now. I would really like to get some excess weight off my body. It is not a great amount, but I would definetly like to tone my body, and get in better shape.
I already eat healthy, so it is a matter of getting my lazy butt up an extra hour early in the morning to start running again! It is just very hard for me to find the will power because, as I have mentioned before, I still don't get a full nights sleep! My baby, she has not slept thru the night yet! It is hard for me, because I LOVE SLEEP too! OH how I wish I could do it like I used to!
I am hoping tomorrow, (or maybe even this evening) to start up again, I have to sit down and carefully plan my every step. Especially since I know, it only takes 3 weeks to either start a new habit or kick an old one!

I'm stumped

Ok, so my youngest is going to be 1 year old next month. This has gone by so fast for me. I love staying home with my children! I am my childrens first teacher, and have gotten to see all their 1st's. I stayed home with my oldest until he was 3. We then moved back to New Mexico, and I started to work full time. I then got pregnant with my 2nd and have stayed home with her. I did have a job when she was 1, but I didn't need outside care because I was working evening, night, and weekend shifts. Eddie watched them.
NowI am stumped because I am thinking of getting a job. It will take lots of calculations to see if it is even worth it for me to work, and then have to pay x-amount of money for childcare. Another problem I am facing is finding someone that I can truly trust with my babies.
Eddie doesn't want me to work, ever, PERIOD. It was something we both agreed upon when we first got married, he'd make the money and I'd raise the babies.
I guess it is just all that I have going on that makes me want to be like the ants and store away for the future. I stop and think, of all the bills we have and how with his income, he is able to cover them all, and us be comfortable, and I get this fear that I will lose everything if something would happen to him. There is no way I could ever bring in the amount of money he makes. At least not at entry level.
oh why must I worry, worry, worry?
I just would like to ask for all to keep me in their prayers that the Lord will lead me to make the best decision for all.

so i finally added some pics to the county fair entry

one thought led to another

Today is one of those days. It is hard for me to see someone I love so much, struggle daily. How do you help someone who sometimes shuts out the world? This is one of my most difficult journeys. I see the desire for a better life, I can feel them asking why this has happened. I cannot find the answer no matter how hard I look. I seek answers, googling away, yet there is no cure ultimately?
On another note, can you truly help someone who chooses not to be helped? The simple answer to this is no. Like my dad has said to me plenty of times, you can lead a horse to water but cannot make them drink. My dad is such an inspiration to my daily life. He is the most patient person I know. He never holds a grudge, and always tells me "today is a new day, a new beginning." Patience is a virtue, and this dear man holds it!
How awesome, I came to this blog to vent out my stress, and my thoughts were geared automatically toward my father, who I look up to, and I feel better just thinking of how he would handle my situation.
I often will step back and think, ok how would my dad react? why? because he is amazing, is quick to respond with some kind uplifting words, and slow to anger. I cannot count on my one had the times I have seen him truly angry.
Dad, I love you so much!

IT IS A JOURNEY

Fall is here. The leaves are falling, the winds are blowing, nights are getting longer, days shorter. This is one cold day. I realized I have not been blogging lately. I guess I've been in a funk, I have a life filled with drama. Everything in my life has always been intense. Therefore, the cards I have been dealt are ultimately no surprise to me. It is just HOW I choose to deal with the issues in my life, that determine everything else.
This has been a difficult journey for me, at least in the past year, where things have been at their worst. I have hit rock bottom in all hopes of ever being happy. But, in the end, I have learned that I must pick myself up off the ground, and try, try, again. I am learning to humble myself to the Lord, I am in no way shape or form, an expert on spirituality, I am such a rookie. I have come to realize, that my life has been like the poem "Footprints" because Jesus has carried me thru the rough times.
I used to deal with negative things by just producing more negativity to the situation. I have come to learn that this not correct. It not only does not help the issue, but makes for more problems. I have had to deal with things that have tried my patience, and tested my faith. I am growing more and more as a follower of Christ.
PRAISE THE LORD, FOR YOU HAVE NEVER FORSAKEN ME, OR MINE, NEVER LEFT US HUNGRY, OR COLD, OR FINANCIALLY DISTRESSED!

It sucks not to have insurance

Well, I had my eye appointment. I have been procrastinating getting it done, because I don't have medical insurance. Just as I suspected, it was expensive. My eyes are so jacked up, Every year, I need a different prescription. I have okay vision, but I have astigmatisms, and I have cataracts. I finally found contact lenses that I feel okay with. I am still getting used to them though, and it will take time. I also needed new glasses, so I am out around 500 bucks. I have something else that they refer to as chronic dry eye. My tear ducts don't produce enough tears to lubricate my eye....At the moment, I can't afford insurance. Thank God, my children are Native or else I don't know what we would do.
On another note, I went to Santa Fe yesterday, the girls had a check up. So, I dropped by the mall, because I get these coupons all the time from Victoria's Secret and I figured may as well use them instead of throwing them in the trash, (its like free money)... Any whooo... I stopped at Claire's and got Miss Esmeralda's ears pierced. She didn't shed one single tear. The lady doing the piercing was shocked. She said wow! I have never done a baby that hasn't cried. I was so proud of her. When she got pierced she just kept on staring at the lady. It was awesome! Eddie was ok when I got Vanessa's ears pierced, but when he saw his little Emmie, he almost cried. He said, "why are you making her grow up so fast" &"she is our last baby, lets keep her that way"... It was just his emotions getting the better of him. But I guess it really is sinking in to him that she is the last of the Trivino's. (our Trivino's anyway)

its been a while

It has been a LONG time since i blogged... been busy. Getting the kids ready for school, thats a busy time of year ya know? I have 2 at home, Vanessa has class one day a week. I am still officially going nuts over here. Esmeralda is so busy, she spends most of her day, emptying every drawer, or cabinet she can pry open...so, this means on top of everyday household chores, I now have to CLEAN CLEAN CLEAN, after a baby. My little toddler/preschooler, Vanessa, is also a busy little bee. Her current hobby is drawing, on walls, doors, car seats, and herself. oh the joys of motherhood.
Lets see what else has happened: went to the movies, once with the kids to see the GI JOE action flick, then on a date with MR Eddie, to see Inglourious Basterds... they were both real good. Can't wait to see the new Tyler Perry movie we love Madea!
Eddie went for 2 loads of wood already, but we need about eight more I think. I like the house cold in the summer, and HOT in the winter. We burn alot of wood...
Vanessa has a potluck at school tomorrow, and I am stumped, I don't know what to take....
Esmeralda is going to be walking, I think, she is along the furniture...she has 5 teeth with one more protruding... so yup she is a grouch....

county fair

well it was county fair this weekend. we had so much fun. alex entered some exhibits, he got 1st in woodwork, 1st in tie dying, 4th in a drawing, cloverbud for an airplane, and his 4h club got 1st for their spirit table.
he is so happy. we went out today to the fair again. it was hot, but fun. we got to see the bull riding, it has always been something of interest to me. it looks like such a rush, i want to try it. after the bull riding, alex entered the greased pig competition. he caught the little booger by the hind legs, but in order to win, he had to carry the damn thing out of the arena, and it was too heavy for him. he also participated in the one boot race, fun stuff. he was in the lead, but he couldnt find his shoe in the pile!
it was fun to see my kids enjoy something that i always enjoyed going to.

out to dinner

yesterday was payday. i was grumpy. no dinner. i visited with a friend for a little while. then i came home to find that UPS had dropped my avon order off, and left it on the porch. bad move. vanessas little puppy, meeko, he ate most of my order. now i have to re-order everything, and guess what i make no profit, cause i have to pay out of pocket for everything. stupid dog!
anyway, eddie asked me why i was so grumpy, i said i didnt know, i just was in a bad mood, and i want to go out and eat, cause i dont want to cook. so he said ok. well on the 14th was my parents 30th (WOW!!) anniversary, so eddie invited them to eat with us. my dad said he didnt feel like going out since my mom had already cooked dinner. my mom went along for the ride, and to have a salad. we ordered appetizers, and our drinks, and i thought what the hell, i'm already grumpy, so i told the waiter to bring me a corona. well, its been a long time that i have had any alcohol (no im not a drunk either) but damn it tasted so freakin good! alongside some texas cheese fries, it hit the spot.
i am not a drinker, but once in a while i'll throw one back with eddie just for the fun of it. and it was nice. we had ribs (i ordered a full rack, but my children attacked it) and it was not busy at chili's since it was a weeknight, and i'm glad. with me in a bad mood, a crowd was not what i needed, so for the very first time in a long while, the service at chili's was great, and so was the food.